Imagine being face to face with a man accused of raping his eight year-old stepdaughter. He wants to explain to you that what he is accused of is not what it seems. Nothing is what it seems. My body has to remain calm and I have to listen to this man because I am here to help him. My job is to help this man find a job. A person changes so much in those minutes.
This is a true story. I did have an encounter with a man who kept asking me to hear him out regarding his situation. I was 28 at the time but looked about 20. He was in his mid 40s. I had to present myself in a certain way at work because I had to be taken seriously by men who were twice my age. I looked at this man as he sat across my desk and said, “I don’t want to know.” He finally calmed himself and we got back to business of finding him a job.
Change. We all experience it many times in our life. I changed so much after that encounter and having that type of position. Hopefully, we will all grow exponentially in our 20s and 30s. The most growth for me has happened between 28-35 (my current age). I barely remember the person I was before 28 because so many changes have taken place in my life these last few years. God got me through so much and is still sitting by my side now.
Growth is painful. Change is hard. Some people you knew before may no longer recognize you physically or spiritually anymore. All that matters in the end is that you are doing what you have to do for you. I am past the age of caring what people think about how I live my life. I pray God orders my steps, other than that I don’t sit around afraid of people’s thoughts.
Some people who know me personally feel I changed a lot in the last few months. I have and I haven’t. The real question shouldn’t be whether I have changed but whether I am growing into the person I should be or not. Am I a better person today than I was in May? That’s the real question. Have I learned a little more about myself? The answer to those questions are complex. I have changed in the sense that I have had difficult experiences lately and distanced myself from those I don’t feel care about my well-being. The coping methods I used ten years ago no longer work. For example, now I go walking when I’m stressed instead of sitting around biting my nails.
In my “new” blog, Reshaped Thoughts, I want to discuss more issues of change and transformation. We are all constantly transforming and will until we release our last breath. The focus should be on changing for the better. There are many ways to do that and I’m learning. If anyone has other methods to teach me how to cope with change – let me know.
Peace and blessings!